Don’t judge me when I say this. To my complete embarrassment, I got my hair cut last week having not cut it properly for a year. Oooops. Well between my super straight perm and my not so great curly perm, I’ve not really felt the need for a cut.
There are also many reasons I try to avoid the hair dresser. First, from previous experience, I find they like to just play with my hair. How many people does it take to dry shoulder length hair? Ireland- 1. Korea- 3. Yes 3 people standing around messing and “drying” your hair is surely not safe. Then it takes another two to cut it. Although it’s one to cut and the other just stands there staring. Weird. Then some more hair touching before they final realise I’ve been there for about 3 hours and only got a wash, cut and blow dry. I’m finally allowed to leave with my newly cut hair safe in the knowledge that the second I’m out the door they’re on Naver selling the waygook hair.
Second reason I avoid the hairdresser is that I don’t want to end up with a Korean cut. Honestly, this hair cutting business is dangerous. Walk in with some split ends and walk out with an Adjumma perm. I don’t want a mushroom cut or any cut that’s the style in Korea. So when I say “cut” there is a 50% chance that I’m going to walk out looking like an 18-year-old Korean boy. Not so good.
Third and possibly most important reason I avoid the hair dresser is that you leave yourself open to a close up inspection by the hair stylists. And I’m not talking about hair. I’m talking about a Koreans general ability to say the most inappropriate things in the middle of a hair cut. Last week was probably up there in the top ten. My stylist looks at me and says ” You have a very……….high………nose” I was shocked. I wasn’t in the slightest way being snobby if fact I was quite the opposite and spent a good ten minutes being slightly embarrassed and this. Then I realised that she meant it literally. My actual nose is high! Doesn’t stop there of course. I’ve had the “your eyes are very big, your hair is yellow (well spotted Captain Obvious), your skin is very dot dot dot (otherwise known as freckles), your face is very small and on and on until my hair is cut and I can escape unsold.
It’s not all bad though. Hair Salons are always good for a cup of coffee or two, free wifi and it usually costs me no more than 25,000w. And of course there is always the magic straight to keep us all looking foreign, eh?